In any system, the element (or person) in the system with the widest range of variability (or flexibility) will be the controlling element. Control in this context is the ability to determine the quality of your experience at any point in time. Control does not necessarily equate to domination.
Choice is better than no choice. No choice means compulsive or automatic behavior.
Having choice in any context gives us the freedom to respond in useful and satisfying ways.
1. If what you are doing isn’t working, try anything else.
2. The person with the greatest flexibility (most choices or ways of interacting) in a system is the person in control.
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